From Akashic Research
The Fifth Gospel
GA 148
8 December 1913, Munich
Translated by Steiner Online Library
The Fifth Gospel I
[ 1 ] Due to certain duties imposed upon me from the spiritual world, I have recently found it necessary to conduct some research regarding the life of Christ Jesus. You know that it is possible to gain access to events that took place in the past through what is known as Akashic Records research. Thus, an attempt was made to gain access to the most important event in the development of the Earth, the event connected with the Mystery of Golgotha. Much has emerged from this that can serve as a supplement to the more spiritual-scientific explanations given to you on various occasions regarding the Mystery of Golgotha. What has now emerged from Akashic Records research is of a different nature; it is, so to speak, of a more concrete nature—a collection of facts relating to the life of Christ Jesus. It is to be hoped that, over time, these facts will coalesce into a kind of Fifth Gospel, and we will speak next branch evening about why it is necessary, especially in our time, to draw from the occult sources what can, in a certain sense, be called a Fifth Gospel.
[ 2 ] Today I would like to begin by sharing a few stories relating to the youth of Jesus of Nazareth, which will culminate in an important conversation he had with his stepmother or foster mother. Some of what will now be discussed as the Fifth Gospel has already been shared with some of you by Miss Stinde; but for the sake of context, I will also have to briefly mention the things that have already been presented to some of you.
[ 3 ] I would like to begin my account today with that event which I have already had the opportunity to describe to you on several occasions: the passing of the Zarathustra-I into the physical body of the boy Jesus, who descended from the Nathanic line of the House of David. I would like to briefly mention that, according to research into the Akashic Records, two young Jesus figures were born at approximately the same time. One was born from what we might call the Solomonic line of the House of David, the other from the Nathanic line of the House of David. The two were very different in terms of their entire childhoods. The body descended from the Solomonic line of the House of David contained the same I that once walked the earth as Zarathustra, and this I had advanced to a spirit who, as is often the case in such instances, appeared childlike during the first twelve years, yet, endowed with the highest gifts, he proved to be one who learned with great speed everything that human cultural development had produced up to that age. We could call this boy from the Solomonic line of the House of David a boy of the highest gift—according to what emerges from the Akashic Records. We cannot apply such epithets to the other Jesus boy from the Nathanic line. He was, in essence, what one might call ungifted in regard to everything that can be learned through the achievements of human science and the arts. He even proved quite averse to learning anything of what humanity has attained. In contrast, this boy Jesus displayed the deepest genius of the heart to the highest degree; even in his earliest boyhood he radiated the warmest love imaginable, absorbing everything in human-earthly terms that could lead to the unfolding of a life in love.
[ 4 ] We already know that, after the two boys had reached the age of about twelve, the I of Zarathustra departed, as sometimes happens in the occult processes of humanity’s earthly development. It departed from the body of the Jesus-boy of the Solomonic line, which subsequently died, and passed into the physical form of the other Jesus-boy. The Gospel of Luke alludes to this by recounting how this Jesus-boy then sat among the scribes, gave his astonishing answers, and was scarcely recognized by his own parents. Thus, from the age of twelve onward, we have that young Jesus with the genius of the heart, who had, as it were, united within himself the sum of all human gifts pertaining to feeling and disposition; we have the union of the I of Zarathustra with this boy Jesus, who, however, at that time did not yet know what was taking place within him: that it was the I of Zarathustra that left the body of the Solomonic boy Jesus and entered into him, and was already at work within his physical form, so that both elements gradually permeated one another in the highest perfection.
[ 5 ] We also know that the biological mother of the Nathanic Jesus boy died soon after, as did the father of the Solomonic Jesus boy, and we know that the two families from which the two Jesus boys had sprung became one family, so that the Nathanic Jesus gained step-siblings from the other family and the biological mother of the Solomonic Jesus boy became his stepmother or foster mother. He now grew up in this family in Nazareth. The extraordinary gift he had displayed when, in the temple among the scribes, he gave those great, powerful answers that astonished everyone, continued to grow. It was something wonderful that took place in the soul of this Nathanic Jesus boy, in whom the I of Zarathustra was contained, from the age of twelve to about eighteen: As if from the subterranean depths of his soul life, something arose that no other human being of that time could have experienced; an immense maturity of spiritual judgment, coupled with a profound originality of his soul’s faculties, made itself felt. To the amazement of those around him, that mighty divine voice from the spiritual realms—which in the Hebrew secret teachings was called the Great Bath-Kol—spoke to his soul ever more clearly. But unlike with the scribes, the Great Bath-Kol spoke to this growing boy in a sublime manner. It arose like an inner, wondrous illumination. Thus it came to pass that even in his youth, Jesus of Nazareth could say to himself in a sorrowful mood: What has become of the Hebrew people since those times, since this people heard the ancient prophets, those ancient prophets who themselves, through their inspirations and intuitions, received the spiritual mysteries from higher worlds? — Then it dawned on this Jesus of Nazareth through inner enlightenment that there had once been an intimate communication between the ancient Hebrew prophets and the divine-spiritual powers; that the greatest mysteries were revealed to the ancient prophets through the sacred and solemn voice of the great Bath-Kol. But times had changed by the present day in which Jesus of Nazareth lived. There were scholars and scribes, and also some prophets who could grasp only echoes—faint echoes—of what the great prophets had once received as revelation. But all that could be attained in the present was but a shadow of the ancient teachings. But as for what was preserved in the Scriptures as tradition, Jesus—who now received it through his direct inner inspiration, through lights that shone ever more brightly within him day by day—felt and sensed that while it was indeed there, the present time was no longer suited to understanding it. His life was powerful in these inspirations.
[ 6 ] It is an immensely powerful impression one receives when one turns one’s spiritual gaze to this point in the Earth’s development, when one sees what was revealed in ancient times, as it were, to the primordial prophets, shining forth once more in the soul of Jesus of Nazareth, and sees how alone he stood among humanity, which had no understanding of what he was experiencing. He must have said to himself: Even if the great Bath Kol were to speak loudly and clearly from heaven, there are no people here who could understand it. What has become of humanity? — This weighed upon his soul as a tremendous pain. Thus we see the boy growing into young manhood. Week by week, new insights arose within him, but each new insight was linked for him to an ever-increasing suffering, to deep, deep pain over what humanity has unlearned, forgotten, and can no longer understand. The entire descent of humanity weighed upon the soul of Jesus of Nazareth. One comes to know many kinds of pain and suffering that people in the world must endure when one directs one’s spiritual gaze toward the evolution of humanity; but the impression one receives from that soul—which, out of pure compassion for humanity, felt the most intense pain, the most concentrated pain, over humanity’s descent, over what humanity was no longer able to receive of what had been prepared for it from the spiritual worlds—is immense. This pain intensified all the more because, in the entire circle surrounding Jesus of Nazareth between the ages of twelve and eighteen, there was no one with whom he could have spoken about it in any way. Even the best students of the great scholars like Hillel did not understand the greatness that was revealed in the soul of Jesus of Nazareth. He was alone with his revelations and alone with his infinite pain, which embraced humanity in boundless compassion. It is this state of mind that I would like to characterize for you above all else in Jesus of Nazareth. While he was living through all of this inwardly, while worlds were unfolding within him, outwardly he worked unassumingly in his father’s business, which was a kind of carpentry and joinery. And so he matured until he was eighteen years old. Then, according to the family’s wishes, he was to undertake a sort of journey through the world, moving from place to place to work here and there for a time. And so he did. And with that we come to a second phase in the youth of Jesus of Nazareth, which lasted from about the age of eighteen to twenty-four.
[ 7 ] He traveled to many different places, both within and outside of Palestine. He went to all sorts of regions inhabited by Gentiles; even back then, he sought out both Jews and Gentiles. One could observe something peculiar in this personality, something that will always be among the most instructive when one attempts to explore the mysteries of the human depths: One could observe that the immense pain he had experienced in his soul was transformed into immense love—as it so often does when it is selfless—into a love that works not only through words but through mere presence alone. When he entered the families among whom he was to work, one knew from the way he carried himself, from the way he simply was, that the love which can come only from a human being radiated from this soul; a love that did everyone good, in whose atmosphere all who perceived it wanted to live. And this love was transformed pain, was the metamorphosis of pain. Many things took place that gave the people among whom he lived the impression that they were dealing with a human being unlike any who had ever walked the earth. By day he worked; in the evenings the families gathered at the places where he worked, and there he was among them. Everything that could radiate from his love lived in such families. People believed they were in the presence of more than a mere human being when he spoke his simple words, which were, however, imbued with what he had lived through from the age of twelve to eighteen. And then, when he had moved away from that place again, it was as if, when these families gathered together, they still felt him among them, as if he had not left at all. One still felt his presence. Yes, it happened again and again that they all had a real vision together: while they spoke of what he had said, while they rejoiced inwardly in what they sensed of his presence, they saw him come in through the door, sit down among them, felt his loving presence, heard him speak. He was not there in physical presence, but a vision shared by all was there.
[ 8 ] Thus, in many regions, a sense of kinship gradually developed between Jesus of Nazareth and the people he came into contact with over the years. And everywhere, people spoke of the man of great love. Many passages from the Holy Scriptures were attributed to him. Although people did not understand the Scriptures, nor did they fully grasp him with their minds, they felt his love all the more deeply in their hearts, along with the extraordinary nature of his existence and his influence. He traveled not only to Hebrew regions but also to pagan areas, even beyond Palestine. Curiously, his path also led him to those pagan regions where pagan teachings had fallen into decline. He came to know many pagan places whose ancient places of worship had fallen into ruin.
[ 8 ] Thus, in many regions, a sense of kinship gradually developed between Jesus of Nazareth and the people he came into contact with over the years. And everywhere, people spoke of the man of great love. Many passages from the Holy Scriptures were attributed to him. Although people did not understand the Scriptures, nor did they fully grasp him with their minds, they felt his love all the more deeply in their hearts, along with the extraordinary nature of his existence and his influence. He traveled not only to Hebrew regions but also to pagan areas, even beyond Palestine. Curiously, his path also led him to those pagan regions where pagan teachings had fallen into decline. He came to know many pagan places whose ancient places of worship had fallen into ruin.
[ 10 ] I have tried to summarize in German what he heard there; to convey, as best I could, what he heard. And it is significant: I was able to share these words for the first time at the laying of the cornerstone for our building in Dornach. It is like the reverse of the Christian Lord’s Prayer, which he himself was to reveal much later in the familiar form. But now it had the same effect on him as it might once have had before the beginning of Earth’s evolution, had it been revealed as a cosmic Lord’s Prayer. This is how it sounds when translated into German:
Amen
Evil reigns
Witnessing the dissolution of the self
Guilt of selfhood blamed on others
Experienced in our daily bread
In which the will of Heaven does not reign
In which man has separated himself from Your Kingdom
And forgotten Your name
You Fathers in Heaven.
[ 11 ] Like this:
Amen
Evil reigns
Witnessing the dissolution of the self
Guilt of selfhood blamed on others
Experienced in our daily bread
In which the will of Heaven does not reign
In which man has separated himself from Your Kingdom
And forgotten Your name
You Fathers in Heaven.
[ 12 ] What spoke to him from those regions where the pagan gods had once worked seemed to him like a great and mighty revelation. These words, which at first sound simple, in fact contain the mystery of the whole process of incarnation—of the human being’s embodiment in physical, earthly corporeality, of the connection with physical, earthly corporeality. They contain this mystery. One comes to realize more and more—as I have convinced myself through gradual meditation on these words—what immense depths are contained within them. One might say that the entire ancient pagan heaven, which expressed itself in this mystery of the Incarnation as in a macrocosmic Lord’s Prayer, was at work at that time upon the fallen Jesus of Nazareth, who was in a state of rapture. And when he came to his senses again, he saw the last fleeing demons, who had taken the place of the old, good pagan gods, and saw the people fleeing in the distance. But to the pain he had suffered through the revelations of the Bath-Kol, for which humanity was no longer ready, he had now suffered a second pain in that he had to recognize: Even that which had once spoken to paganism, even that which were divine-spiritual revelations for paganism, is now in decline. Even if all the voices of heaven were to resound today, humanity would not have the capacity to receive them. — So he had to tell himself.
[ 13 ] It is a profound experience to see how much suffering had to be accumulated within a soul in order for the Mystery of Golgotha to be prepared. It is a profound impression to realize, through these things, what pain must have flowed into that impulse which we call the Christ impulse for the further development of the Earth. Thus Jesus had also come to know the essence of paganism and the essence of its decline.
[ 14 ] When he was about twenty-four years old, he returned home; it was around the same time that his biological father died. He was now alone with his siblings—all of whom were his step-siblings—and his foster or stepmother. Then something peculiar began to happen: Little by little, his stepmother’s love and understanding for him grew ever deeper, while his siblings did not understand him. Something like a genius of the heart began to sprout within her. With her heart, she was able to gradually—albeit only little by little—understand the lonely one who carried the suffering of humanity within him, while his brothers paid no heed.
[ 15 ] First, however, he was to learn about something else: the community that, so to speak, revealed to him the third aspect of humanity’s decline. He was to learn about the Essene community. This Essene community, which had its headquarters at the Dead Sea, was widespread throughout the world at that time. It was a strict, self-contained order that sought, through a certain disciplined, ascetic life, to ascend once more to those levels from which humanity had descended during its decline; to ascend through exercises of the soul to that spiritual height where once again something could be perceived of—whether one calls it, in the Jewish sense, the great Bath-Kol, or in the pagan sense, the ancient Revelation. Through rigorous training of the soul and seclusion from what humanity otherwise practiced, the Essenes sought to achieve this. What they strove for had attracted many. They had various properties scattered far and wide across the land. Anyone who wished to become an Essene had to surrender what he had inherited or might yet inherit to the communal property. No one was allowed to keep property for himself. Many Essenes had a house or estate here or there, which they dedicated to the order. As a result, the order had its settlements scattered throughout the regions of the Near East, particularly in Palestine, and also in Nazareth. Everything had to be communal property. The Essene order performed great acts of charity. No one owned anything for themselves. Everyone was permitted to give from the communal property to anyone they considered to be poor or in need. Through spiritual exercises, one attained a certain healing power that had an immensely beneficial effect. They had a principle that would be impossible today but was strictly observed at the time: anyone could use the common funds to support people they deemed worthy, but never their relatives. One had to detach oneself from all the sensory ties connected to the external world.
[ 16 ] Like John, whom he had met briefly among the Essenes, Jesus of Nazareth had not actually become an Essene; but because of the immense power his soul possessed, the order treated him with great trust. Much that was otherwise reserved for members of the higher ranks was discussed with him in confidence, based on the way his soul worked. Thus he came to recognize how they were once again striving upward along a steep path toward the heights from which humanity had descended. Thus it often seemed to him as if he could have said to himself: Yes, there are still people among us who are once again ascending to that which was once revealed to humanity in primeval times, but which humanity in general does not understand today.
[ 17 ] Once, after having just had a profound conversation about the mysteries of the world within the Essene community, he was deeply moved. As he walked out through the gate, he saw two figures in a vision. He recognized them as Ahriman and Lucifer, and he saw them fleeing from the Essene gates. He knew they were fleeing into the rest of humanity. He now had such visions frequently. It was the custom among the Essenes that they were not allowed to pass through the ordinary gates of a city or a house of that time that were adorned in any way with images. They had to turn back before such gates. But since the Essenes were numerous—there were as many Essenes as Pharisees living in Palestine at that time—consideration had been shown to them, and very simple gates of their own had been built for them. The Essenes were therefore not allowed to pass through any gate that displayed any images. This was connected to their entire spiritual development. That is why there were special Essene gates in the cities. Jesus of Nazareth had often passed through such Essene gates. He always saw how Lucifer and Ahriman moved away from the gates in a way that was particularly threatening to humanity. Yes, you see, when one learns about such things theoretically, they certainly make an impression; but when one comes to know them as one can through a glimpse into the Akashic Records, when one truly sees the figures of Lucifer and Ahriman under the same conditions as Jesus of Nazareth saw them, then it makes a very different impression indeed. Then one begins to grasp the deepest mysteries not merely with the intellect, with the mind, but with the whole soul—mysteries that one does not merely know, but experiences, and with which one is one.
[ 18 ] I can only stammer out in feeble words what now weighed upon the soul of Jesus as a third great sorrow: He realized that in his time it was indeed possible for individual human beings to withdraw from the world and attain the highest insight, but only if the rest of humanity was all the more cut off from any development of the soul. At the expense of the rest of humanity, such people, he told himself, seek the perfection of their souls, and because they strive for a development through which Lucifer and Ahriman cannot reach them, these must flee. But as these individual people break free, Lucifer and Ahriman flee toward the other people. The more such people rise high in their isolation, the more the rest of humanity is plunged into decadence. This was indeed a terrible realization for Jesus of Nazareth, who felt undivided compassion for all people, who could not help but feel the deepest, deepest pain at the thought that individuals should rise in their soul’s development at the expense of humanity as a whole. Thus the idea formed in him: Lucifer and Ahriman gain ever greater power within humanity precisely because some individuals wish to be the Pure Ones, the Essenes. This was the third great pain, indeed the most terrible pain; for now something like despair at the fate of humanity on Earth sometimes welled up in his soul. The mystery of this fate of humanity on Earth came upon him with terrible force. He carried this fate of the world, compressed within his own soul.
[ 19 ] This was the case, for example, when he was in his late twenties and early thirties, it was after his mother—who was his stepmother or foster mother—had come to understand him more and more deeply that, one day, when they both sensed that their souls could understand one another, he entered into a conversation with this stepmother or foster mother—that conversation of such infinite significance for the development of humanity. Now, during this conversation, Jesus of Nazareth realized how he could truly pour into his stepmother’s heart what he had experienced since the age of twelve. Now he was gradually able to put into words for her what he had gone through. And he did so. He told her what he had felt regarding the decline of Judaism and paganism, regarding the Essenes, and regarding the Essenes’ hermitage. And it was so that these words, which passed from the soul of Jesus to the soul of his stepmother or foster mother, did not seem like ordinary words, but as if he had been able to imbue each of his words with some of the full power of his soul. They were inspired by what he had suffered, by what had directly emerged from his suffering as love, as the sanctity of the soul. He himself was so united with this suffering of his, with this love of his, that something of his very self floated on the wings of his words into the heart, into the soul of this stepmother or foster mother.
[ 20 ] And then, after he had recounted what he had gone through, he brought up something else that had become clear to him, which I will now summarize in terms derived from spiritual science. This will, however, only convey the true meaning of what Jesus of Nazareth said to his stepmother or foster mother; I will choose my words so that you can understand them more easily than if I were to stammer out directly in German what emerged for me from images in the Akashic Records. Jesus of Nazareth spoke to his stepmother or foster mother about how, through all his suffering, the mystery of human evolution had dawned upon him—how humanity had developed. Thus he said to her: “I have come to realize that humanity once passed through an ancient epoch in which, unconsciously and with the freshest vitality of childhood, it received the highest wisdom.” — With these words, he alluded to what we in spiritual science refer to as the first post-Atlantean cultural epoch, when the holy Rishis of the ancient Indian people were able to bring their great, mighty wisdom to humanity. But Jesus of Nazareth viewed this wisdom in such a way that he could ask himself: How had this wisdom been received by the holy Rishis? What forces were at work in the souls of the Rishis and in the entire ancient Indian people? These were forces that otherwise reign only in childhood, between birth and the age of seven in a child, and which then fade away for the individual, but which at that time were poured out over the entire span of human life. Because these childhood forces were spread out over the entire span of human life, these ancient, sacred, divine truths flowed down into the human mind through inspiration and intuition. But with this first epoch of humanity in the post-Atlantean era—which we call the ancient Indian cultural epoch, and which Jesus of Nazareth compared to early childhood when speaking to his mother—the passing of this epoch also meant the passing of the possibility of preserving the forces of childhood into later life. They faded away, and thus humanity was no longer able to take in and retain within itself what had once been revealed to it. Jesus of Nazareth went on to speak of an epoch that followed, which could be compared to the human age from seven to fourteen years, but in which the forces that are otherwise present only from seven to fourteen years of age were spread out over the entire human lifespan, so that people still experienced them in old age. Because this was the case—that even later stages of life could be permeated by these forces—it was possible in this second, the pre-Persian epoch, to attain those teachings that we recognize as the Zarathustra teachings, which Jesus of Nazareth now saw being rejected by humanity through a lack of understanding. During the third epoch, to which Jesus of Nazareth could look back and of which he now spoke to his mother, what is otherwise experienced between the ages of fourteen and twenty-one was poured out over all generations, so that people still possessed at fifty or sixty years of age the forces that otherwise act only until the age of twenty-one. Through this, the significant sciences of nature’s workings—which we so admire when we delve into Egyptian and ancient Chaldean science, into the true foundations of their astrological knowledge, that profound knowledge dealing not merely with the Earth but with the mysteries of the world and their effect on humanity— and of which later humanity could understand only very little. But Jesus of Nazareth also saw the third epoch fading away. Just as the individual human being grows old, he said, so has humanity grown older.
[ 21 ] Greek culture received its most powerful impulses from the wisdom of the mysteries, which brought about a golden age of philosophical thought and art within it, but also brought about the transition to the fourth cultural epoch, in which we ourselves live, an epoch that already appeals to human independence and creates new social structures that break with dependence on the old mystery system. The decline of the ancient mysteries begins with the rise of the new states and their rivalries; yet this is also linked to rapid intellectual advancement. The forces that can grasp only the most minimal aspects when spread across the entire human lifespan are now present. We live within a humanity that can now only comprehend with the forces inherent to humanity between the ages of twenty-one and twenty-eight. But when this cultural period has passed, humanity will have reached its middle age; with this, a certain peak is reached that cannot be sustained any longer. The decline must begin, albeit slowly at first. Humanity is entering an age in which the forces are dying out, in a similar way to how the individual human being reaches the age in their thirties from which the decline begins. The decline of all humanity begins with the next age already, as Jesus of Nazareth said, as the full pain of this future decline of humanity passed through his soul. Humanity itself, he said, is entering the age in which the original forces have died out. But while the forces of youth can, as it were, continue to work for the individual human being, this cannot be the case for humanity as a whole. It must enter an invincible old age if no new forces come into it. He foresaw the desolation of earthly culture if no young forces enter it. The natural forces have dried up when humanity enters the age that, for the individual human being, runs from the twenty-eighth to the thirty-fifth year of life. If no other sources open up then, humanity would grow old.
[ 22 ] Summing up these thoughts, Jesus of Nazareth said to his mother: “What will become of all humanity if it is subject to the fate of the individual human being?” — Faced with the force of this question, Jesus—and with him his stepmother—felt the need for a new spiritual impulse. Something had to come—something that could only come from outside, something that was not within humanity itself, because after this middle age, something new in the inner human forces, unrelated to the sensory world, could no longer unfold freely within the human being. Something had to be expected from outside, something that would otherwise grow from within during the period between the ages of twenty-eight and thirty-five. And with a tremendous force, incomparable to anything else, the pain that nothing in the environment existed that could pour forces of renewal into decaying humanity wrung itself from the soul of Jesus of Nazareth.
[ 23 ] This is how the conversation had unfolded, and with every word, something seemed to flow from his very being into his stepmother or foster mother. The words had wings, and in them was expressed the fact that they were not merely words, but that something was wringing itself out of the physicality of Jesus of Nazareth—something that was precisely like his self, something that had become one with his pain and his power of love. At that moment, as his self broke free, what this self truly was shone within him for an instant: the awareness of his own I as that of Zarathustra. Shining, shining for a moment, he felt himself as the I of Zarathustra. Yet it seemed to him as if this “I” were leaving him and leaving him alone again, so that he was once more the one he had been in his twelfth year, only greater, grown.
[ 24 ] A tremendous change had also taken place in the mother. If one investigates in the Akashic Records what is happening there, one finds that shortly after Jesus of the Nathanic line had reached the age of twelve and the Zarathustra-I had become indwelling within him, the soul of his biological mother had ascended into the spiritual regions. Now she descended again as a soul and animated his stepmother, who was thereby rejuvenated. Thus, the stepmother or foster mother—who was the biological mother of the Solomonic Jesus child—was now spiritualized by the soul of his own mother. Thus, from this time on, the soul of the biological mother of the Nathanic Jesus-child also walked the earth again in a physical body—in the body of the mother of the Solomonic Jesus-child. He himself, however, was as if alone with his three bodies—physical, etheric, and astral—yet imbued to the highest degree by all his experiences; yet the Self had departed. For everything that originated from the I of Zarathustra dwelt within this physical, etheric, and astral body. Although the I of Zarathustra had withdrawn, all its impressions had remained. This meant that there was something quite special about this remarkable personality that Jesus of Nazareth now was, after the I of Zarathustra had departed from him. And what was there within him presented itself to me, as I was able to perceive the further course of events in this Fifth Gospel, just as I describe it.
[ 25 ] After the conversation with his mother had taken place, something like an urge stirred within Jesus of Nazareth—from whom the ego of Zarathustra had departed—an urge that seemed like a powerful cosmic impulse, driving what was now of him toward the banks of the Jordan, toward John the Baptist. On the way there, this strange being—for such was now Jesus of Nazareth, a being who carried the highest humanity, as is otherwise only possible with four fully developed human limbs, across the earth’s surface in only three human forms, a being who felt himself to be something other than a human being on the inside, yet who outwardly had the form of a human being— this being encountered, after speaking with his mother and having felt the urge within him to go to the Jordan to John the Baptist, two Essenes, two of those Essenes who knew Jesus well. Strange, of course, did it seem to them what was expressed in his features; yet they recognized him by his outward appearance, which had not changed and was clearly discernible. Yet they found him strange. Through the transformation that had taken place within him, his eyes had taken on a very special expression. Something spoke from these eyes like an inner light that shone gently, like human love embodied in light—not earthly, but heavenly. The two Essenes saw in him an old acquaintance. They felt this so strongly that they could not withdraw from the immensely gentle, infinitely intensified gentle gaze of Jesus as he was now. But then again, when they looked into those eyes, they simultaneously felt something like a reproach that did not come from him, something like a force that welled up in their own souls, radiated into his eyes, and shone back, as it were, like gentle moonlight, yet like an immense reproach upon their own being, upon what they were.
[ 26 ] Only with such words can I describe what can be ascertained by looking into the Akashic Records—what these Essenes saw in the soul of Jesus of Nazareth, which they sensed through his body, that is, through his physical, etheric, and astral bodies; which they saw gazing upon them; which they perceived. It was difficult for them to bear his presence; for it radiated infinite love, which at the same time, however, felt to them like a reproach. They found his presence deeply alluring, yet at the same time they felt an urge to flee from it. One of them, however, gathered his courage—since they both knew him from the many conversations they had had with him—and asked him: Where are you going, Jesus of Nazareth? — The words that Jesus then spoke, I could translate into the German language something like this: To where souls of your kind do not wish to look, where the pain of humanity can find the rays of the forgotten light! — They did not understand his speech and realized that he did not recognize them, that he did not know who they were. From the strange nature of his gaze, which was not at all like a gaze that looks upon people he knows, from his entire demeanor, and from the way he spoke the words, they realized that he did not recognize them. And then one of the Essenes roused himself once more and said: “Jesus of Nazareth, do you not recognize us?” — And he replied with something I can only render in the following words of the German language: “What kind of souls are you? Where is your world? Why do you cloak yourselves in deceptive veils? Why does a fire burn within you that is not kindled in my Father’s house?” — They did not know what was happening to them, did not know what was wrong with him. Once more, one of the two Essenes roused himself and asked: “Jesus of Nazareth, do you not know us?” — Jesus answered: “You are like lost lambs; but I was the Shepherd’s Son from whom you have run away. If you truly recognize me, you will run away again at once. It has been so long since you fled from me into the world.” — And they did not know what to make of him. Then he continued: “You bear the mark of the Tempter! He has made your wool gleaming with his fire. The hairs of this wool pierce my gaze!” — And they sensed that these words of his were something like the echo of their own being from his being. And then Jesus continued: “The Tempter struck you after your flight. He has saturated your souls with pride! — Then one of the Essenes gathered his courage, for he sensed something familiar, and said: Have we not shown the Tempter the door? He has no part in us anymore. — Upon this, Jesus of Nazareth said: You did indeed show him the door; yet he ran to the other people and came upon them. Thus he is not with you; he is in the other people! You see him everywhere. Do you believe that you have exalted yourselves by casting him out of your gates? You have remained as low as you were. You seem to have become exalted because you have humiliated the others. In belittling the others, you have seemingly risen high.
[ 27 ] The Essenes were terrified. But at that very moment, as an overwhelming fear came over them, it was as if Jesus of Nazareth had dissolved into mist and vanished before their eyes. But then their eyes were transfixed by this vanishing figure of Jesus of Nazareth, and they could not tear their gaze away from where it was fixed. Then their gaze fell, as if into cosmic distance, upon a gigantic apparition that resembled the face of Jesus of Nazareth—which they had just seen—enlarged to immeasurable proportions. What had spoken to them through his features now spoke with gigantic magnitude from these magnified features, which seemed to spellbind them. They could not avert their gaze from the apparition, whose gaze was directed at them as if from a great distance. Through this, something like a reproach settled into their souls, which seemed to them deserved on the one hand, but unbearable on the other. As if transformed into a mirage in the distant sky, Jesus appeared to these two Essenes magnified to gigantic proportions, and the implications contained in his words also seemed magnified to gigantic proportions. From this vision, from this apparition, resounded the words, which can be rendered in German roughly as follows: “Vain is your striving, for empty is your heart, which you have filled with the spirit that deceptively conceals pride within the guise of humility.”
[ 28 ] This is what the Being had said to the Essenes who had come to meet him, after Zarathustra’s I had detached itself from Jesus’ physical form and Jesus had once again become—only now as an adult—what he had been in his twelfth year, but now imbued with all that Zarathustra’s I and all the experiences I have recounted could instill into this peculiar body, which had already revealed its peculiarity by being able to speak wondrous words of wisdom immediately after its birth, in a language comprehensible only to its mother’s intuition.
[ 29 ] This is what I wanted to share with you today in a simple narrative that begins with the path Jesus of Nazareth took toward the Jordan River after speaking with his mother and John the Baptist. The day after tomorrow, we will continue the story and try to build a bridge to what we have sought to understand as the meaning of the Mystery of Golgotha.